Telepathy will be exactly like this.

Anonymous said: What's the spookiest thing you've ever witnessed while living in NYC and did it qualify as a paranormal encounter?

i was in brooklyn, walking back from an outdoor screening of nosferatu with fucking kronos quartet of all things, and a big thunderstorm started. my friend and i had a bottle of wine sticking out of a satchel looking like a bagpipe. we kept refilling this stupid little cups, which was nonsense because they were constantly overflowing with rainwater. it was really dark out, but we both gasped when we walked past a playground and saw a motionless human form completely wrapped in black plastic, seated upright on park bench facing us. we just tiptoed past it. so it wasn’t supernatural — he probably wasn’t even dead — but it scared the shit out of both of us.

Anonymous said: Hey. Just went through a bunch of your old posts because I started and couldn't stop. : ) But anyway. How'd you learn so much about movies and history? School? Or just a shit ton of reading and watching?

what a friendly message, thanks for checking out my backissues. i really don’t have any formal film education, and i don’t even particularly understand how they’re made or what a budget means unless it’s obscenely high or low. i just know what i like, i read a lot, and i’m compulsively attracted to audiovisual entertainment. it’s probably more important, though, that i’ve had a lot of hardcore completist friends.

Anonymous said: Can you suggest any good movies that are somewhat mind fucking?

watch ANGUISH! watch DER FAN! watch LA VIE NOUVELLE! and um, there’s probably some more spot-on ones, maybe someone else can say something.

PRO TIP: don’t say MARTYRS, i think everyone is over it by now and it’s not necessarily a “good” movie.

Anonymous said: do you get annoyed when people say "my bf/ my gf"?

i’ll assume you’re describing someone saying those abbreviations out loud, and say that would be stupid since ___friend has the same number of syllables as __f.

Anonymous said: so i'm trying to choose a movie to watch and i'm having trouble, i'm stuck between 3 women, the last temptation of christ, slacker, y tu mama tambien, and in bruges

are you narrowing it down from every movie ever made? did IN BRUGES get on this classics syllabus because you’re deliberately listing movies that have nothing in common?

Anonymous said: Any plans to see LUCY?

I have a very stupid soft spot for Luc Besson, but I really fail to understand why anybody would make slow, mumbly, marshmallowy “scarjo” be an action hero. I’d like to say it’s cool when people cast against physical type, but she’s only in movies because people beat off to her so that’s pretty meaningless.

Anonymous said: have you seen boyhood?


Anonymous said: I think anon may have a point, though. Women are FAR more inclined to the additiob of another woman before that of a man ad if two men can't be just as tender and attentive and everything has to be about trainrunning and DPs all the time. I swear, really makes you wonder how far feminism has come.

answer a) you sound like you have a cold.

answer b) ok: if you take a sample of the human female population about the size of, say, china, and ask them about simultaneously screwing two guys neither of whom is you (or any other internet troll), and they ALL say no, then i’ll go along with your wildly unscientific proposal that “women” won’t have sex with two men.

answer c) lay off, dude, it’s pretty much an intergalactic understanding that all anons are virgins.

Anonymous said: omg, WHY are women so averse to MMF threesomes and freak out if you try to field it?

since we even have the term “MMF”, it has to have happened before, so i’m guessing the problem isn’t “women”, it’s you. that’s cool that so many of your guy friends want to fuck you though.

Anonymous said: Do you have a secret Gantz cosplay outfit that you'd prefer the world didn't know about?

i’m on tumblr, the only thing that’s going to hurt me is that i don’t know anything about gantz.

Anonymous said: What is Heaven to Claire Donner?

a) not being addressed in the third person.

b) last week i was served twelve mini hot dogs with hot dog sauce by a guy with a black eye. i could feel deeply, if passingly, that there was nothing wrong at that time.

Anonymous said: Are you a ferret?

yes definitely! i have short legs and i smell bad and you need a license to own me.

Anonymous said: Is feminism real?

this is a much better question, discuss.

Anonymous said: Are you a feminist?

so let’s start here, with a definition:


so now i’m going to say that no, i am not a feminist, i believe that i personally should not have a say in our government, i should have restricted social freedoms, and i shouldn’t have access to or control over money, on the basis that i have a vagina. is that about what you expected me to say? is that really like a pretty satisfying answer that seemed to you to be a realistic option?

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